Monday, 7 January 2013

How to Handle Suicidal thoughts

I came across a news today. A young rapper killed himself because his girlfriend left him. Some people called him horrible names, some sympathized. It reminded me of when I was much younger, when I was a teenager. Sometimes I’d feel alone, unimportant and so insignificant. And I’d ask myself, “Would I really be missed if I were gone?” I thought that life was too difficult, happiness was unattainable and maybe death was the answer. Like Bella in twilight said, “Death is easy, Living is hard”. At first it was just a thought, only a thought. But thoughts are so powerful. I started thinking of the best ways to die. I saw more reasons to die. I felt so alone. I felt like everything was screaming inside of me and yet I wasn’t being heard. But I was so fortunate to have a God who cares excessively for me. He was always there. And He got me through all that. He told me that He had a plan for me. And I got surrounded by positive people.  And now, I enjoy His joy 
so much. 

After I heard the news of the boy, I felt so heavy. He had posted the sequence of his thought right up to his death on twitter, and he apologized to his family. He words were so artistic; I could see that he was talented. But there is no talent and no work in the grave. 

Suicide is borne out of selfishness, ingratitude, isolation and loss of hope. You need to understand that first. Life is a beautiful gift from God. And He intends that we share it. You and everyone around you get to benefit from your life. Just as you benefit from people, other people benefit from you too.  Imagine if Bill gates, Nelson Mandela or St. Paul had committed suicide, our lives would be different. We would have never come to see their greatness. They would have taken their potential and their gift with them. Maybe someone else would try to fill in their shoes, but it would never be the same. Your life is a gift. You get to decide how you wish to use it. Also, suicide is borne out of ingratitude. People with suicidal thoughts always seem to see their situation as unsolvable, as the worse it could possibly be. They look at the things they don’t have. They see lack, pain, injustice. They believe they have it worse off than anyone else. That makes them hate people. The satisfaction of gratitude is not for the one receiving it, but for the one giving it. Life can be tough, and you need to be tougher. I’ve seen people with terrible situations climb to great heights. You have every right to fight for your life, never give up on you.  Suicidal thoughts always go with isolation. The devil likes to isolate his targets. That way you’re removed from any external influences or anyone who can show you that they care. Some people feel so hopeless. Maybe someone just go diagnosed with cancer or something terrible, someone just lost a loved one or got fired.  When you lose hope, you see a future with no good in it. Sometimes you cannot even see a future. If you’re faced with such a situation, see the now. Look around you and find something to be hopeful for, it could be as simple as dinner, or even a call. Start with right now and tomorrow will get brighter. Never lose hope. Sometimes you have to hope against all the odds (Romans 4:18)

Right now as I write this I know that someone might be feeling so alone and so lost and insignificant in this big world. Maybe you just got your heart broken, don’t worry we’ve all had that and we’re still here, take my word for it, “it will heal”. But guess what, everyone has felt that way at some point. Things do get better, that’s if you decide to make it so. Life comes with its ups and downs, and you need to fight for your life and not throw in the towel. Taking your life would change the course of someone else’s.  You fill a vacuum in this world.  You are not alone, lots of people do care. And you can show care to people with similar plight.
So, this is what you do:

  • -          Understand that you are important and significant, the world needs your input

  • -          Be grateful for everything you have, good and bad. If you can read this right now, be grateful because it means you have eyes, and maybe a laptop or something, and electricity and hands to scroll the pages, and intelligence to find this blog. Wow!!! You have so much to be grateful for because I could go on.

  • -          Do not isolate yourself. Be around positive people. Surround yourself with happy people. People that care about you. There are some life sucking people out there, please avoid them like a plague.

  • -          Try to bring happiness to others the best way you can. Say nice things to people. Give a smile so freely whenever you can. Compliment people. Say please and thank you. Lend a helping hand whenever you can.

  • -          Think positive things about your life and you situation. Permit no negativity in your life. If you find yourself feeling like the world is about to end, pump your mind with the happiest thing you know. It could be a song, a friend, or something

  • -          Talk to someone about how you feel. Someone you trust. Someone who cares about you. Talking about it, even just saying it out sometimes is able to show you how terrible the idea is.
  • Acknowledge that your life is a gift from God, not an accident. And He does care so much about you. And He is always there for you. If you can’t see it, it’s because you have not acknowledged Him. Turn to Him, He will respond. He can help you. He was and still is my source of help. Life gets tough; it’s good to know that the toughest person is on your side. If you have any issues with God, settle it because you need Him to live. 
  •  Finally, Live. Don’t just exist. Live your life. Explore your gifts. Eat good food, eat bad food and laugh about it. Go to school, learn. Jump when you feel like even when people are looking. Express the fullness of your life.  Enjoy life, ups and downs and all. 

“I have come that they may have life, and they may have it more abundantly”… John 10:10b

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